The Royal Ascent

Presented by Patty Smack

Get ready for a night of delicious debauchery as disco witch and utterly demented showgirl Patty Smack returns to Aotearoa for a late-night cabaret of weird & sexy chaos.

Joined by a crazy cast of wickedly delicious local burlesque, circus, pole, and dance artists serving acts to make your jaw drop, grind and gape for a taste. Hot, steamy, dripping in sauce, and hosted by a fabulously fierce MC (line-up to be announced).

In collaboration with WQAF and Last Place, festival-goers can also indulge in a limited-edition Patty Smack burger meal deal available throughout the festival — because no saucy show is complete without a side of something satisfying.

Content Warning: This is a strictly R18 event and may include nudity, explicit themes, and food/mess play.

Come hungry. Leave well-served.
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Accessibility & Care

LOUD Creative and Patty Smack are committed to maintaining a respectful, professional, and inclusive audience experience. If you have accessibility needs or questions about the performance, feel free to get in touch ahead of time.

the@pattysmack.com

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Patty Smack’s Super Saucy Meal Deal is proudly presented as part of the Waikato Queer Arts Festival.

Ticket information:

Restricted 18+

$55

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Shortlisted for the 2026 Adam NZ Play Award, The Terrifyingly Adorable Possibility… is a sharp, heartfelt romantic comedy asking the question: What happens when the girl who once declared her love for you on Myspace walks back into your life twenty years later?

Harriet met Winter in 2005. “Met” is a loose term. They “met” on Myspace. Don’t pretend you don’t remember the horror… The birth of carefully curated selfies, HTML-coding for profile pages, jet-black hair (and nails, and souls), Top 8 friend rankings, and everyone’s first Myspace friend, Tom. They were dramatic, idealistic, eyeliner-heavy teenagers who started something they had no idea they were never going to be able to finish.
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Set against the vibrant absurdity of the Armageddon Expo, The Terrifyingly Adorable Possibility… features seven actors, across 20-something characters, in a queer, Kiwi comedy about timing, reinvention, and the terrifyingly adorable possibility that some connections don’t fade.

This play focuses on the importance of writing our own stories even when the universe insists that someone else hold the pen. And celebrates the families we’re born into, the families we create along the way, and the weird breadcrumb trail our younger selves leave behind.
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This play contains:

Discussions of sexuality, queer relationships, and polyamory

References to online communication, nostalgia, and teenage emotional intensity

Mild sexual references and adult language

Themes of jealousy, emotional vulnerability, and relationship uncertainty

Depictions of past emotional confusion and coming-out experiences

While the tone is comedic and warm, the play explores honest emotional stakes around love, identity, and navigating relationships outside traditional norms.

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Let the Games Begin!

Book now to secure your spot in our Mini Escape Room Tournament!

Each ticket covers one person so be sure you've booked for your group size. $25 per person. We recommend groups of 2 - 4 compete together. Please double check the date and time as you book.

Each ticket includes:

Access to our Mini Escape Room Tournament where you will solve your way through four epic stories

Our Puzzle Pass - A board game pass with access to all day gaming and our stash of table-top mystery/escape games

Staff will be available to give hints at all times through the tournament. Hints will be penalised!

Top teams for each mini escape room will receive a prize at the end of the tournament

Disclaimer:

This event covers access to our Mini Escape Rooms, which are designed to fit into a suitcase. This does not include our full sized escape rooms

The extra game time is to be used during our regular opening hours on the day that you have booked. If you are booking a later time slot for the tournament, we recommend that you come in earlier in the day if you wish to use the game time too. No returns or exchanges can be made so please plan accordingly

Late arrivals will still be accepted but your time slot will not be extended

Book online to secure your spot. We can not guarantee that there will be availability for walk-ins

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Kirikiriroa/Hamilton, are you ready for the first Rita Menu extravaganza of 2026?! This Kirikiriroa Pride week, join us for what is guaranteed to be an amazing night full of passion & pride, dedicated to celebrating the incredible takatāpui Māori talent that we have in abundance here in Aotearoa.
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This show is dedicated to acknowledging and validating the "mana" (strength, pride, and identity) of Pacific Rainbow, LGBTQIA+, and gender-diverse communities. Mana is about holding your head high, carrying the strength of ancestors, and being recognized for one's true self and talent. We are honoured to invite you to witness some of the most legendary takatāpui performers that will introduce you to what mana truly means to them through the art of drag, beauty, and expression while representing a connection to their culture, people and whenua. There are many powerhouse takatāpui drag performers in Aotearoa and we are bringing you just a taste of the immense talent that is out there.
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HOUSE OF MANA moves beyond just entertainment. We are framing & serving drag as a powerful form of expression that carries the weight, the power and responsibility to uplift others. But you will be entertained, there is no doubt about it. HOUSE OF MANA is unlike anything you have ever experienced on the drag stage and we can't wait to have another unforgettable Rita Menu drag show with you.
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Prepare yourself for a night of visibility and celebration of all who are melanated & divalicous, on and off the stage.
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Grab your tickets and come on down and find us at Biddy Mulligans back bar on Friday 17th April, you know we never disappoint!

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